Eve of Andi's Birthday

Andi has less than 12 hours left of being a one-year-old, though her behavioral development will tell you she has already entered her "terrible twos" months ago. I fully intended to have a thoughtful post written for her, but today's goings on have prevented this from occurring and so hopefully, this wknd, that post will come.

In the meantime, it is nearly 10:30 PM and I still have one more batch of cupcakes to make, 2 batches of pink frosting (per Andi's request) to make, and Dave is searching grocery stores for balloons for us to blow up and leave scattered on the floor. We couldn't have her wake up to nothing.  Tomorrow, according to Andi, is "cupcake day" and, "I BE TWO!"

I spent a better part of the day forming a business partnership with a nutritionist -- not only does it seem that our private practices compliment one another, we hit it off as gentle, soft-spoken kindred spirits.  Like any good introvert, at the end of our meeting, I came home drained, but had messes to clean up, and dinner to make.  While I should have started immediately on birthday prep for tomorrow as well as a trip to the gym, I spent the night ruminating...

Is my brother ok?  Not only did his company lay people off today-- again -- but he's been dealing with a health issue....I hope the diagnosis is nothing...I hope he isn't next to get laid-off.  I'm sorry he has to say good-bye to those that did.  Fucking company.  

Is my friend ok?  Her husband called, their new baby is fine, but my friend is in inpatient psych for the serious but more rare form of postpartum depression -- postpartum psychosis.  I feel helpless and scared for her...because I know the dark and very crazy-feeling, scary place that she has entered.  And these feelings are mixing with a new, gradually emerging anger towards "lactivists" and other "natural birth" advocates, and "natural parenting" advocates.  They have swung the pendulum so far in the other direction...I believe...that their position is also harmful to women and their psyches.  More on this in another post.

Tomorrow's a new day.  Andi's smile will be there, her giggles, her health, her sassiness...it's HER day and as mom always says, "Everything will be okay..."