Last week or the week before there was a letter to the editor in my local newspaper. I tried to find it online because I wanted to provide the link so that you, the reader, would believe me when I said it was written by a crazy person.
The man (a conservative) who wrote the letter indicated that there were "takers and makers" in the world, and that "takers" were outnumbering "makers." He then indicated that women especially were "takers" in our society.
His warped view served as a distraction of true issues and actually fixing anything. So I decided an angry retort to the editor was not warranted.
Expressing passionate opinions -- especially about political issues -- brings out the crazies. I'm talking about me, though, now. Give me three nights of minimal sleep, five hours at MD offices the day before, and a high maintenance child that becomes even more high maintenance while throwing up every 15 minutes into a bucket
THAT HER BABY SISTER THEN DUMPS ON HERSELF
and there you have it.
A sure way for me to come un-done.
Have you ever come un-done? Maybe misread something, acted angrily, and then find out you inserted snarky sarcasm where there was none?
I have. Today.
I thought a crazy man had posted to my blog. And the first thought I had was "Oh God. I've gone too far. I never should have written OOC I & II on this blog." Doing so had possibly brought in an audience I didn't want anywhere near my children. The poster's wording didn't make sense to me. There were no verbal cues, body language cues, and I had no idea who in the hell he was or what he was really trying to communicate.
So I consulted four people whose opinions I trust and respect.
Now as it all turns out... Yes... Here's the funny part. The person was probably trying to be "cute." Really?
Or perhaps they were a "tired liberal, I hear that sort of statement all the time at meetings of democrats." And then he continued, "You know being a great writer also means you should have good reading comprehension. Way to go, Superstar."
Ouch. But deserved.
...Happen to be pretty compassionate and respectful people. I know this because, even as I write very strong opinions, the numbers on the blog have been clicking up at a fast pace recently (who in the hell, I wonder, cares what I have to say?), and while some have directly disagreed with me, they were respectful. I tolerated it. And after meeting Dr. Boyt, I appreciated it. Because it meant they still had their voice and they were still engaged, and in a good way.
So I'm not proud of going off half-cocked. You are very lucky if you are even-keeled.
As the day went on and Sophia threw up all over the leather couch, the throw pillows, the carpets and the rugs. And as Andi screamed that she couldn't hold the throw up bucket. And Ella complained OVER AND OVER that she wanted to go to the park, or watch TV, etc.
That I needed to offer an apology to Salt. I'm sorry. The loss of one's dignified bearing is often sudden. -- Jerry Van Amerongen
That I needed to keep up my courage to keep going with Change Writing and stay engaged with A and Dr. Boyt. This gave birth to Giving Voice to Passion: My Journey Towards Change which will contain OOC type writings. Nothing, yet, is written on that blog. I've spent today wondering how to clean up vomit and my self-created social mess.
I need to lessen chances of crazies being attracted to my blog. That being said, for now, it will not be privatized, but it will no longer be a place for me to express political opinions. It will be a mom-blog, but I will still write using brutal honesty, and humor, though that is often accidental.
...Are my thoughts on pregnancy loss. October 15th is Remembrance Day, and I want to contribute my voice so that the three little babies I never met, who would now be 6, 7 and 10 years old are not forgotten. Nor are the other babies lost daily.
He who speaks without modesty will find it difficult to make his words good. -Confucious