Did That Really Just Happen?

So it's been a week full of odd happenings.... 

I have had to clean up doll poop.  Yes, DOLL poop.  Some dumbass decided to give her daughter the doll she always wanted...and the doll eats real food then poops it out.  And the diapers often leak.  And the 4 yr old is grossed out.  And so dumbass has to clean it all up so that we can do it all over again because the doll cries and announces "she is hungry, she is thirsty, feed me!  Let's play! Let's sing lalalalalala, Uh oh, I pooped, Please change me mommy!"

Sophia with little-miss-pee-pee-poo-poo

We saw the home directly behind us go up in flames.  I've never seen a home burn before and it was a bit traumatic to watch -- that poor family.  The pics below are before it really got going....

Then I took the twins to the Mall of America because the back pack that holds Ella's new American Girl doll broke when  it was only 48 hours old.  They nicely exchanged it for us.What's weird about this? Nothing. The weird part happened as we were bundling up to leave the mall when a mad woman stuck her finger in my mouth.

Yep.

Stuck her finger in my mouth. 

The moment it happened I thought "should I begin swishing my mouth out with my hand sanitizer?"

This woman picked me -- ME! -- out of a crowd of folks bundling.

"My sister is really mad at me!  She is soooooo mad at me.  Please. Will you talk to her?  She doesn't believe me when I tell her where I am.  Here.  Talk to her. Tell her where I am."

And at this point, she thrust her cell phone onto the side of my head and her pinky finger, which was sticking out as she held the phone went in the corner of my mouth.


Some woman on the other end of the phone, who sounds very sane compared to the woman I have tottering around in front of me, asks me  to describe where her sister is at the Mall of America.  I explain the entrance we are at and she thanks me at which point the Mad Woman hangs up the phone removes it from the side of my face and tells us -- as well as the crowd that has gathered to watch this show -- that, "Today is  my 52nd birthday! Woo!  I am 52 today!  What did you guys do today? You looked at dolls? Oh! I loved dolls. I had a red headed doll. She was my favorite. I had three. Today is my 52nd birthday. My sister is so sick of me.  But she's coming." 

And with that, she teetered out the doors...I'm  not sure if she was manic and/or drunk, and the inability to stand still could be attributed to needing to pee, I suppose, or the manic-ness.

I turned around to my girls and saw the crowd watching me.  Loudly, in my head, I said "I did not know her."    On the outside, I dressed my twins and acted as if this was all in a day's work.